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Metselaar, too, sees poor quarantine behavior as a common dealbreaker named by her followers: “People are turned off by those who are not socially distancing at all. Or worse—not social distancing while living with their parents, or grandparents, and putting their [relatives’] lives at risk.” Anecdotally, it’s true: in June, I’d been idly chatting with a handsome, successful thirty-something who sheepishly admitted he’d blacked out at a house party and then returned back to his family home. “I have that Sunday guilt of you’re better than this,” he said. I stared at my iPhone screen. A day later, he posted an ignorant message referencing the Yes I do have a retirement plan I will be beekeeping vintage shirt but in fact I love this Black Lives Matter movement on his Instagram story. That, it turns out, was my dealbreaker.
They used to say opposites attract. Is that true, in polarized and plagued 2020, where common ground seems to have cratered into a canyon? Where avoiding confrontation and “agreeing to disagree” can actually mean you are complicit in systemic or institutional biases? Suddenly, dating someone with unkempt hair or bad B.O. doesn’t seem that problematic. After all, not wearing deodorant never hurt anyone. But do you know what has? Not wearing a mask.
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